Diabetic Fiction?

I've been looking through my favorite books and searching the internet for some reading material. I'd really like some fiction.

I've noticed something though. In all of my books and everything I can find, none of the characters have any health problems. Yeah, I know, kind of a weird thing to be looking for but I'd like to see a character that has something other than a personality flaw. I want to read about someone that not only goes on an adventure, fights evil and falls in love but also has a chronic illness to deal with. Kinda sadistic? Maybe. I don't think sadistic is the right word but I'm having a major brainfart right now.

I'd really like to find a main character that's diabetic or someone who has ADD or just something that doesn't come from getting old. Does anybody know of a main character that's diabetic? I've read a few non-fiction stories and I have found them very interesting but I really don't like non-fiction for my pleasure reading.

The only movie I've run across where diabetes had a role was a Lifetime special where said diabetic's "best friend" was trying to kill her with her insulin. She put alcohol in the bottle rather than insulin. Interesting but I want more than just that. It's gotta be out there, I just don't know where to find it.

Maybe I should make an attempt. LOL Yeah I can see it now, I'd have like 15 stories started and they'd never get finished. I've never been all that great at finishing what I start. I have like 15 posts that I've started but never finished and therefore never posted. Gotta work on that.

Merry Christmas!!!

Hello World!!!!

Merry Christmas!!!!

This morning is rocking. I woke up with a nice 394. Talk about Grinchy Jessi. My mouth tasted like the south side of sick cow. Oh well, I got up and grabbed or rather jabbed 11 units of Christmas insulin. Then it was present time.

I'll get pictures up ASAP. I've gotta get them from my mom first. We all had quite the haul. I got a Swiss Army laptop back pack. A down comforter with a heated mattress pad. A new set of ear phones. A 12 piece cooking set. Some sugar free chocolate candies. A Pirates of the Caribbean t-shirt. A really cool pen with all the names of Jesus. Oh and new mountain bike (Got that a little over a month ago.) Now I know I forgot something... Oh yeah I also got an all expenses paid trip to Seattle and Disneyland thanks to my awesome aunt. That's why the blogs have been so sparse lately. But that's a different blog. I'm going to attempt to put up a few today.

So as I sit here blogging, Derreck is running around with his comforter on his back like superman, Lars is trying to get somebody to open up his candy cane and Karl is attempting to put his pirate ship together. I'm very content sitting in our orange chair with a happy tummy. Daddy made homemade waffles for breakfast. Mine was doused in sugar free syrup of course.

And finally, we have definitely had a white Christmas. We have nearly six inches of snow. It's very beautiful. As I said above, I will add pictures to the post as soon as I get them. So...

Merry Christmas!!!

Oy!

I'm going to try to make sense with this post but, I'm still sick and when I'm sick I have a very difficult time focusing.

My grandpa finally got out of the psych ward this afternoon. The home he's in now invited us to have dinner with him tonight. I saw there was a lady that was putting all the medicine together for all the tenants. I noticed that she had a meter and test strips and figured there must be some diabetics in the home. I was wondering how many carbs the dinner was going to have so Mom suggested that I go ask her. She must know since you'd obviously need to know how many carbs there were to be able to properly take care of the diabetics.

"Ma'am? Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, what do you need?"

"I was wondering how many carbs are in the meal tonight."

"Oh, we don't keep track of that."

What?!

"Well you've got diabetics here, how do you know how much insulin to give them or if they're on track with their meal plan?" I said exasperated.

"Well we don't do anything intensive like that. We just make sure everything is low sugar, stuff like that." She said this like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Since when is counting carbs intensive?

And low sugar my butt! They served us a large cup of juice for our drink. The main course was meatloaf with half a plate of corn and some new potatoes. That might be low sugar but that was the furthest from low carb. I mean, half my plate was nothing but corn. Then we got some very sugary desserts. I glanced at someone I had seen have their blood sugar tested. They got the same thing the rest of us did.

If they don't keep track of carbs then how do they give these people the proper amount of insulin? The diabetics in that home aren't going to die of whatever has put them into assisted living, they'll be killed by such poor care. The lady said that they aren't that intensely trained, they aren't nurses. Apparently they just treat the diabetics like the rest of the patients. They give them their drugs at the appropriate times and otherwise let them do whatever.

I really hope Grandpa never gets diabetes because that place would kill him. Good grief, that really got me ticked. I don't even know the people that have diabetes in there but I feel upset for them. That particular home is for the memory impaired so it's not like they can stand up for themselves. I'm still fuming.

Lucky Strip With Jess.

That's what keeps bringing people to my blog. Well I'm sorry to disapoint, but Jess don't strip. Jess uses strips and is usually lucky but YOU aren't going to be lucky enough to catch me stripping. (Sorry for the images Daddy) Oh yeah, just be warned all potential stalkers. My dad is very protective of his only daughter.




Jess is a Type 1 Diabetic who likes to talk in third person.

The Sick Meme

I feel like procrastinating. I feel like garbage. I've got swollen glands that feel like golf balls, a fever, and I finally understand the phrase, "waves of nausea."

So I feel like doing a meme. Stole it from Kerri.

1. Were you named after anyone? Nope. From what I've been told, Jessica Nicole is the only name my parents could agree on.

2. When was the last time you cried? Last night, I read a really heartbreaking story.

3. Do you like your handwriting? I hate it. Nobody can read it and everybody assumes that I'm a guy based on my handwriting. It might have something to do with the fact that I changed school three times while I was learning how to write and each school taught it's own writing style. So my handwriting a mixture of cursive and print mushed into one.

4. What is your favorite lunch meat? Roast Beef, hands down.

5. Do you have kids? Not for a while. Although, I'm so much older than my brothers that I have been accused of being their mom. Funny thing is, a week after that I was given a ten and under menu. I was 17!!

6. If you were another person, would you be friends with you? Heck yeah!! I love crazy people.

7. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Never. LOL

8. Do you still have your tonsils? Yes, and I'm rather attached.

9. Would you bungee jump? With an actual bungee cord? Yes. Blood sugars? NO.

10. What is your favorite cereal? Golden Crisp or as my family refers to them: Sugar Bear. I love that stuff with whole milk and a bit of heavy cream.

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Never. I do have to re-tie them on regular basis though. I constantly trip on the laces pulling them untied.

12. Do you think you are strong? Don't underestimate me just because I'm short. I'm proud of my strength. I've got a handshake that makes missionaries envious. As far as emotions, I'm getting stronger.

13. What is your favorite ice cream? First of all, it HAS to be Aggie Ice Cream. Raspberries and Cream mixed with Cookie Dough. That was happy accident discovering how well those two mix.

14. What is the first thing you notice about people? How they interact with those around them. If it's a guy my age, I generally notice the eyes first.

15. Red or Pink? It's not pink it's lightish red. LOL I prefer red but I've been told that I look great in hot pink, I'm just not that fond of wearing pink. Too girlish for me.

16. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My lack of self-discipline.

17. Who do you miss the most? My Grandpa. I miss his personality and sharp, teasing wit.

18. What color pants and shoes are you wearing? My blue jeans and my orange and black tennis shoes. (What else? I don't wear anything else.)

20. What was the last thing you ate? A chicken enchilada and a mix of hot chocolate and french vanilla cappuccino.

21. What are you listening to right now? Pandora, the current artist is Nickleback. Love them. Now we're on Metallica

22. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Blue. Similar to the color of my eyes.

23. Favorite smells? Old Spice, original scent. This is what both my grandpa's wear, my dad and my little brother. Evergreens in the winter. Sagebrush. My Grandma Specht

24. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Lady at the hospital to see how late blood work can be done today.

25. Favorite sports to watch? Basketball, Hockey, Football, Baseball, Karate

26. Hair color? Dirty blonde.

27. Eye color? Blue.

28. Do you wear contacts? No, but my roommates thought I did until they noticed that my eyes were always the same color. They couldn't believe that my eyes were naturally the color they are.

29. Favorite food? Alaskan King Salmon. I'm rather fond of my freshly caught rainbow trout. There's something incredibly satisfying about catching your own food.

30. Scary Movies or Happy Endings? Boom-Booms please. I love explosive endings. I guess that could be scary.

31. Last movie you watched? In theatre, Beowulf. Right now we're watching Arthur and the Invisibles.

32 What color shirt are you wearing? A loud yellow t-shirt. It's my volunteer shirt from the Howl.

33. Summer or winter? Winter. You can always put on more clothes. There's only so many you can take off.

34. Hugs or kisses? Both for family. Hugs for good friends and handshakes for everyone else.

35. Favorite dessert? Cheese cake

36. What is on your mousepad? It's a laptop, no mousepad. I have a mousepad sitting around that I would use if I had a mouse. It's a hologram mousepad from the Navy.

37. What did you watch on TV last night? The Bourne Ultimatum

38. Favorite sounds? Music. My dad's voice. My cousin's laugh. That weird sound my mom makes with her cheeks. My brothers playing.

39. Rolling Stones or Beatles? Neither. Please. Give me some Eagles.

40. What is the farthest you have been from home? France.

41. Do you have a special talent? I can love anyone. I can forget and forgive easily. I can make friends with almost anyone if you give me enough time.

Weight Watcher.

Be warned, this is a whole bunch of rambling and may make no sense at all. (Basically, like all of my other posts LOL)

I've never been one to worry about my weight. Before I was diagnosed my weight sat around 140 lbs. which I was very happy with. It wasn't perfect for my 5' 4" height but I was happy with it. I felt healthy.

I never worried, until I was diagnosed with diabetes. Within a week of getting on insulin I had hit 150, now I hover around 160. I feel sick with my weight. 160 is too much for me. I do some sort of exercise almost every day but I can't get the weight to drop.

I must admit, during the summer I very seriously considered skipping insulin in hopes of getting down to the proper weight. Just before school started, I had gotten to the point where I couldn't get enough insulin due to insurance issues. So I stretched my remaining insulin to stave off DKA. I was happy with the weight loss, I got down to 145. Unfortunately it ended up with me in the ER. Once I started getting the right amount of insulin, I gained back all the weight I had lost.

Now I don't know what to do. I'm really trying to eat healthy. I just don't understand why I can't get back to where I was without drastic measures.

Before diabetes I never worried about my weight, I never thought about what I ate and I never exercised for the sake of health. Now that is something that is always at the back of my mind. Is this healthy? Have I gotten in my 30 minutes of exercise? Why can't I stop gaining weight? Will this weight have an impact on my BG control?

I have thought about skipping insulin intentionally. It would be such an easy way to lose weight. Eat all you want and still lose weight, isn't that the perfect diet? But then I think about all the consequences. Yes, you may lose weight but you ruin your body in the long run. I remember reading a study on diabulemia where they followed like 15 women and only 3 are still alive after about 10 years. All of the others died from complications of diabetes. That's not how I want to go. I want to live a long productive life with no complications of diabetes. So I'm not skipping insulin.

Yet...I can't stop worrying over my weight. I don't understand.

Bits And Pieces.

• Can I just say, I love a person named Holly. She has been working really hard to get me a pump and to make sure that my insurance covers it. She sends me an email on everything that happens. This morning she said she's gonna pester my insurance until she can get the pump to me. I'm going on a trip on Saturday and she said she'll try her very hardest to get the pump to me before then. She rocks my socks!! (To borrow a phrase from Spoon)


• Our tree is up!!! It has standard multi-color lights and old fashioned bubble lights. It's nearly done!!
  
• Next I'm going to attempt to get some lights on the front of our house. We have some icicle lights that have been sitting in the cupboard since we moved into the house. I think it's about time we lit up the front of the house.


• No Christmas is complete in our household without Trans-Siberian Orchestra (TSO). And, of course you can only listen to it with the full sound system at full blast.


• I think I've got a cold. My blood sugars have been floating too high for my liking. I've been lethargic and sore. I just feel downright yucky.


• And to close this. I just stepped out onto the front step to bring the dog inside for the night. Well I didn't notice the thick layer of black ice that covered the cement. Fell straight onto my butt. I think the dog was laughing at me. That's my version of holiday cheer...make the dog laugh at me. LOL Happy holidays!!

"Hell If I Know!"

I've been bungee jumping again. Only, it seemed that the cord broke after a couple of bounces.

For most of the day I've been floating in the 300s after a very low 75 this morning. At the church Christmas party they served spaghetti, rolls and tons of dessert. Carbalicious!! I could have gone heavy on the salad but...I didn't.

Oh, it all looked so good.

According to the meter, I was still high, so I added in a correction with the shot to cover dinner and dessert. Man, the food was tasty.

After the party I walked to Malchik's house and visited with him and his family. I had a ton of fun up there. Before I left, I checked my blood sugar to see how I was doing before I walked home. It rang in at 76. Best number I've seen all day. But it was a bit too low for my comfort so ate some glucose tabs and headed on my way.

A few hours later I was sitting out front with dad surfing the net and watching TV. I noticed that I was losing focus on what I was reading and that my heart had started pounding. An error and about ten finger pricks later, the meter read 72. What the heck? I ate some more glucose tabs and returned to the Internet. 15 minutes later: 112. Finally. Then the symptoms hit again. This time my head was pounding and my heart was racing. I was so shaky I was having a hard time contacting the blood to the test strip.

"Damn it, sit still." I commanded.

My dad looked over at me and then told Mom over the phone, "Jessica is yelling at her blood."

"Well you would too." I defended.

When I finally caught it, the meter glared a 66 at me.

"What the flip! What the heck is going on?" I yelled in frustration.

Dad looked over with concern. "What's up?"

"I can't keep my flippin' stupid, idiotic blood sugar up and I'm starting to get a bit pissed!" I shouted at him. "No matter how many glucose tabs I eat, it keeps dropping."

"Then go eat some cake."

He was referring to that turkey I showed in my earlier post.

So I went to the kitchen and pulled off a leg and started chewing on it. I'd gotten half way through it when the cat decided that she was gonna get sick on the carpet. Oh no you don't! So I set down my turkey leg and ran to get her on the linoleum. I didn't get her fast enough but I ran her to the laundry room just in case she wasn't done. I walked back to the hall and cleaned it up.

It was a few minutes before I got back to the kitchen to finish my turkey leg. Only problem was that I couldn't find it. I couldn't remember where I set it down. I looked all over the kitchen trying to track it down. It wasn't anywhere. I checked all the counters, the cake plate, the garbage, the fridge (I've been know to put stuff in weirder places when I'm not low.) It had disappeared. Dad walked in and asked what was up.

"I lost my turkey leg."

"Well it's gotta be here somewhere." As he began to search too.

We both looked everywhere including the laundry room.

"Where the heck could I have put it?"

"Hell if I know. There's no rhyme or reason when it comes to where you put stuff.
"It'll walk out in about six months and declare its arrival."


What was going on today? Hell if I know!

Leaving My Mark.

I had just pulled out of my paren'ts driveway and I was just about to the intersection.

Ring, ring!!

I jumped off my bike and dug through my front pocket trying to fish out my cell. I glanced at the caller ID, Grandma.

Cool, I didn't expect a call from her.

"Hey Grandma!"

Startled, "Oh, hi honey, I was trying to get your mom. Not that I mind that I got you." I could hear the smile in her voice.

I walked my bike with one hand while yacking to Grandma. Ten minutes later we were still chatting and I wasn't really paying attention to my surroundings. I kinda noticed some orange cones on the sidewalk but I didn't pay them any attention. As I walked between the cones my shoes sunk a bit and squelched as I picked them up.

"Hey!!" An angry voice shouted at me.

As I turned to find the source of the voice, I noticed the sidewalk I'd just walked over had three very clear footprints. My footprints.

I looked to the man that had caught my attention, he was on his cell trying to get a hold of someone. I gave him an apologetic look and he waved me off with an understanding face.

"You are not going to believe what I just did."

"What?"

"I just walked through wet cement."

"What!!"

"Yep."

I heard smothered laughter from the other side of the line. "Oh honey. I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh at you but that's rather funny. Can they just just smooth it out?"

I made a face. "Unfortunately, no. It's too late for that."

***

Oh well, I've always wanted to leave my mark on Malad.