World Diabetes Day!!

Today is an awesome day. More is taught about diabetes today, than any other day of the year. Today is World Diabetes Day. A day dedicated to raising the world's awareness of how dangerous diabetes can be. We diabetics take today and give our quiet disease a voice. Many blog, many participate on Twitter, and other's take extra time teach their friends, neighbors and community.

Diabetes is a chronic illness. There are three main types: Type 1, Type 2 and Gestational. There are many others too, such as LADA.

Since I'm Type 1 myself I'll explain about that one.

Type 1 usually refers to diabetics who's ability to live is dependent on their injected insulin. Without insulin, they would not survive. Most people pick it up as a child. But not all people get diabetes at a young age. Personally, I didn't get it until right before my 18th birthday. I know others who don't get it till their 20s and later.

Generally it's caused by the immune system becoming confused and attacking the part of the pancreas that produces insulin. This causes a deficit of insulin, causing blood sugars to soar and the child is usually sent to the hospital and diagnosed within a month. Over about a year, the body eventually stops producing any insulin at all. This year is called the honeymoon. The pancreas produces a little insulin but eventually wears out because it can't produce enough insulin because of immune attack.

It's taken care of by a regimen of either multiple daily injections of insulin or a nifty tool called an insulin pump.

The second main step is eating a careful diet. This does NOT mean, they can't eat sugar. They just have to watch their carb intake and bolus (take insulin) appropriately. I personally try to make sure I eat about 300 grams of Carbs a day. This is one place where family and friends definitely help me a lot. We eat at friends often and they are always sure to save carb counts of everything they've made and keep track of all the ingredients in their dishes. They also usually have diet pop on hand and now almost always use whole-grain in everything they make. I can't say how much this means to me and how much it helps me.

The third main step is exercise. About 30 minutes, five days a week. Very important and definitely something I need to get back into the habit of doing. Exercise is a great way to lower blood sugars and keep them low.

And last, but probably the most important, is testing your blood sugar on a very regular basis. Personally, I try to test when I wake up, before and after every meal, before I drive and before and during heavy exercise. Usually, I'll test about 7-10 times a day. Some people think I'm nuts, but I think it is critical to watch my blood sugars very closely to keep my HbA1c as close as I can to 6.5%. (This is my personal goal) By doing this, I prolong my life and live healthier every day.

There are many other things that go into caring for yourself. As a Type 1 myself, I could go on for hours about it. My most helpful resources for caring for diabetes are my wonderful husband, my family and my awesome friends! Without them, I wouldn't be in the pretty awesome health I am.

If you have any questions, definitely drop me a line. And on a more personal note, my blood sugars have been awesome the last few weeks and it looks a CGM has been approved by my insurance! Woot! And hopefully, I'm going to be in school this Spring semester. Now I have Gotta get to work.

World Diabetes Day 2009

View more presentations from International Diabetes Federation.

30 Things About My Invisible Illness You May Not Know

1. The illness I live with is: Type 1 Diabetes

2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: 2007 (January 24th)

3. But I had symptoms since: For about a month. Type 1 Diabetes is quick to make it's self well known. At least for me.

4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: That I have to stick to a schedule, be consistent and NOT lose my damn meter. (Which is currently hiding somewhere in the apartment, I hope.)

5. Most people assume: That Type 1 Diabetes must be awful. (Usually goes, "Wow, isn't that the worst kind? Doesn't that suck? I couldn't do it.") It's not to me. In fact, diabetes has been a blessing. It's taught me so much and is teaching me, by force, that I must be responsible. Rather ironically, diabetes forces me to be more healthy than I ever would have been without it. Diabetes is just a daily pain in the ass, literally some days.

6. The hardest part about mornings are: Waking up to a low or a high that makes me late to work because I can't drive until it's taken care of.

7. My favorite medical TV show is: Does Bones count? There's medicalish stuff in there.

8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: My insulin pump and meter.

9. The hardest part about nights are: Being visited by Mr. Ambitious (aka, my husband) in the middle of night and then stumbling around trying to figure out where the heck I put my meter and that juice I had stashed by the bed.

10. Each day I take: Insulin and usually at least one juice box (or sugar cookies) for a low blood sugar.

11. Regarding alternative treatments I: Think anyone who thinks I can live without insulin smoked a little too much pot while researching their latest 'cure'.

12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: I'd really rather not be sick. But given the choice, I'll take invisible. That way, people can't make assumptions about how well I can do my job before they see me DO the job.

13. Regarding working and career: Diabetes doesn't hold me back. It does make me feel like I have to work harder to prove that Diabetes won't hinder my ability to do the job, though.

14. People would be surprised to know: That just because I'm not visibly sick doesn't mean I don't feel like a walking pile of crap. High blood sugars make it hard to stay awake, make me incredibly sore, and seemingly attached to the bathroom. Lows are usually embarrassing and irritating. I break down crying, can't talk or feel so floaty I feel I've lost touch with reality. But I usually just laugh it off and take action to correct the high or low. I don't like people worrying. If they're laughing, I can deal with diabetes better.

15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: That eating a huge stack of Oreo cookies with milk doesn't make the world better anymore. ;) Especially if I forget to take insulin with it.

16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: I got married. It still amazes me that Zane married me knowing full well that I get sick often. That despite all the hard work in the world, complications may still claim me early. He never saw me as a diabetic. He always just saw me, Jess.

17. The commercials about my illness: Kinda suck. They're usually about Type 2 (and usually confuse people into thinking that all diabetes is the same)

18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: Indulging my sweet tooth. (I miss my Oreo's.) ;)

19. It was really hard to have to give up: The ability to sleep and eat whenever and whatever I want. I'm only 20 for goodness sake.

20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Blogging. Spending time researching and learning about diabetes and other chronic diseases.

21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: Eat "The Sink" (an entire sink of ice cream with four different toppings) at Angies. Just to show Zane I can. ;) I would anyway, but I haven't figured out how to eat it without ending up in a coma for a few days.

22. My illness has taught me: Patience, responsibility, understanding. That consistency is indeed, crucial.

23. Want to know a secret? One thing people do that gets under my skin is: What pisses me off faster than anything else? Taking food away from me. Telling me I shouldn't eat it. Just watch how fast I come unglued on you. People think it's their responsibility to tell me what I can and cannot eat. I've been doing this almost three years, I think I know what I'm doing. I know what those M&Ms are going to do to my blood sugar and my body. How do you know that my blood sugar wasn't low? Very sore spot for me.

24. But I love it when people: Just listen. When people honestly want to learn about my illness and are willing to let me vent at them. The most precious gift friends have given to me, is when they take the time to learn what diabetes is and how it affects me. Then support me, help me and provide a support network. There's nothing more precious to me than someone who honestly cares and understands.

25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: My personal thought: God is strengthening and teaching me by using Diabetes as a sculpting tool. It is not a negative thing, in fact it has helped me become who I am.

26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: Get a support network, whether it's a local support group, a Yahoo mail list, a forum or the Diabetic Blogsphere. Find a friend that can learn with you. Diabetes is damn hard on your own. Finally, never keep it a secret. People can't help you in an emergency if they don't know what you need.

27. Something that has surprised me about living with this illness is: That's it's really not the end of the world. Life goes on at a break-neck speed. You still date, you get married, have a career, have a family and you can even grow old. 100 years ago, I would've been dead last year.

28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: Zane called in to work and then took care of me for the rest of the day. Just being held made it that much easier to get through the roller coaster of blood sugars.

29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: It is vitally important to help healthy people understand what it's like to have a chronic illness.

30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: That you're freaking awesome, or just rather bored and stalking my blog or Facebook.

I'm Registered and Walking for a Cure!

So in lieu of yet another canned page, how about we get a little personal, eh?

For those of you who don't know any diabetics other than me, who don't know what it's like to live with diabetes everyday, let me give you a small (long winded) insight.

Imagine you're standing on a three foot long wood plank.

Now imagine your plank suddenly got set on a basketball and to make it fun, you have to somehow keep the ball rolling forward. (Life doesn't end when you're diagnosed)

If you fall off, you're gonna hurt like heck. Until you get back up, your body will continue to take lasting damage, possibly leading to drastic, irreversible complications. You're not allowed to take a break and very few other people are able to actually help. But they only can do so much.

Imagine now, you're told, "Now do this for the rest of your life. Don't mess up, don't trip, and never rest."

That is life with Diabetes. It's a constant balancing act, "Constant Vigilance" as Mad-Eye Moody said. Working your job, hanging out with your friends, going to school, getting sick all the while.

Watch your blood sugars, Make sure you get enough exercise, but not too much, Make sure you eat right, but not too much, Don't forget to get your insulin dose perfect too, but never too much.

It's always on your mind. Once diagnosed, there is nothing in your life that Diabetes doesn't touch, affect and change.

Just the thought of being able to walk on even ground again... This is what makes everyone, who has diabetes or has a loved one with it, fight for a cure, constantly hope for an end and the opportunity to live without worrying about how to just survive.

If you have the means to help by donating money, it's greatly appreciated. If not, take the time to do a little research and learn more about Type 1 Diabetes. A little knowledge goes a long way.

Thanks and Appreciation to all,

Jess and Zane Kuddes

Here's where you can go donate: http://walk.jdrf.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=extranet.personalpage&confirmID=87407186

Strike One!

So first of all, Dr. New has lost favor. As anyone who has talked to me recently has been told repeatedly.

One of the next things I've been working towards getting is a CGM. (A CGM is a Continuous Glucose Meter. This, Dexcom, is the one I've been working on getting. It basically checks your blood sugar every five minutes and actively charts your bloodsugars so you can see if your blood sugars are rising, dropping or actually behaving for once.)

I've had my eye on one since I learned about them. I'm finally in a situation where we can afford one. We both have full time jobs, we both have insurance. I'm dual insured and I thought I had a proactive doctor who was willing to bat for me.

In our last appointment, he not only fouled out, he downright pissed me and Zane off.

If he'd pissed me off by just saying I need to work harder, I would've taken that. But instead he blew me off.

We talked about how well the new basal rates are working. I showed him the filled out logbook that he requested. I mentioned that I've been having lows just before dinner and he wanted to radically change my rates all over again. He wanted me to change every single rate. Not just the ones around dinner. I tried to explain that I disagree but he ignored me and continued changing my basals. So I moved on, figuring I'd give it a run for it's money and see how it goes.

As all doctors do, he asked if I have any questions before we're done with the appointment. I told him of my plans to get a CGM. All I need is him to help me finish convincing insurance that having one would increase my health. Providing me with a longer more livable life.

Instantly he started balking the idea. By the end of the conversation Zane and I were seething. He essentially told me that I am not important enough for him to back me up. He doesn't want to tarnish his reputation. Rather saving his reputation for more important patients, such as one who is a surgical doctor or one who has gone repeatedly to the ER. Telling me that my line of work isn't important enough, nor am I close enough to dying for him to think me important.

I'll never understand reactionary medical practitioners. You'd think, provided the opportunity, you'd jump on the chance to take preventitive measures. Tighter BG control from the beginning, rather than waiting till the disease has begun to take it's toll on me.

He said he was afraid of being seen as an over prescribing doctor. I'm trying to understand where he gets off on saying that. I'd bet a good amount of money that he has a challenge just to get most of his patients to even test more than once a day, let alone take a proactive role in their care.

I want to prolong my life, I want a better quality of life. I want to have low blood sugars stop sneaking up on me. What would happen if I'm driving down the road and I don't feel the low until I've already caused an accident? What if I'm slicing meat and lose a finger?

Explain to me why I'm not important enough? I thought doctors were doctors to help people, not build their reputation.

I've got everyone working for me but a man who is supposed to be a central node to my health care.

Dr. New!

So post-Dr. check-in.

I think I may just kiss my new doc. He has a thick accent but definitely isn't thick headed.

So I fell in love with the clinic before he even walked in, the nurse did her normal stat checking stuff and asked me for my meter so she could upload all my numbers. So cool! Never had that happen before.

Dr. New entered the exam room and gave us both a handshake and grinned when I asked how the heck he pronounced his name. I'm gonna guess he's from India, considering his name and accent.

Anyway, he was all business after the introductions had been taken care of. He asked me what all my stats were on my pump, my ratios, my basal's and then took a look at my bloodsugars. After explaining to him that I couldn't get out of the 200s he took a few minutes doing some math and came out with new basal's for me to try out. Although, I had to correct him on the time that the basals needed to change. He had a hard time getting his head around the fact that my morning is at 12:30 pm-1pm and that I don't generally get to bed until 5am. But once I convinced him that that was truly my standard day, he redid the times. Anyway, he then has me going to a diabetic nutritionist that he works with. They are both going to work with me to get my numbers back into a semi-normal range. Zane and I will be visiting her Wednesday.

I'm excited to finally have a proactive doctor who doesn't shove a ream of information at me and tell me to have fun. He saw my problem and instantly started helping me figure out how to fix things.

We've upped my basal's and changed my Carb to Insulin ration from 13:1 to 10:1 and my sensitivity to 1:25. So far the basal change has made quite a difference. My fasting BSs have gone from being 200 to 85. And throughout the day, I've been staying between 80 and 120 except when I eat. I'm hoping the nutritionist will help me figure out what I'm doing wrong with food. Though, eating burgers, salads and Malt-O-Meal cereal everyday might not be the most nutritional diet. Interestingly enough, I've lost 10 lbs on this diet. -shrug- Who knows, maybe it was all the walking before we had a car.

I'm just happy. Life is good. And it looks like I'll finally have a doctor who can help me with diabetic stuffs. :)

Still here, Just have no time.

Here's a nothing post to say I'm still alive and kicking, just have no time. At all. I swear.

I work in the Deli at Walmart now, work full time and the past few weeks I've been at Walmart for nearly 50 hours a week. We're a little short staffed. But the job is good and I think the managers like me quite a bit now, at least the personal thank-you note I got the in mail made me happy. (putting in overtime probably helped).

Next, Um... Zane and I are coming up on six months married, and I never realized that you could be more gaga than when you first fall in love. But apparently you can. We're sappy proof.

We have a car now, $200 special that we found in the Walmart parking lot. Little 1986 Honda Civic Hatchback. It's our first car... and our first Stick. :D That's been fun. We haven't killed it in at least a week now. Though we've had to jump start it three times now. But we adore our car, we affectionately call it Salt.

Hmm... Ah yes, I'm finally going to see an endocrinologist for the first time on Monday. I'm excited. I'm hoping, with a specialist, I can get my head on straight and get my diabetes under a bit tighter control. When 200 mg/dl is my general average, I think something is not quite right. My last A1c was 8.1. :/ But Zane and I doing our best, he kicks me into gear and I try not growl at him too much. ;) Honestly, we've just been so busy that I just set it in the background and let it slide. The latest A1c was wake up call that got us both into gear.

So all in all, we're doing well. :) We're just busy.

Edit: My A1c was actually 8.6, I misremembered.

Only A Year?

This past year has been a year that I will never forget.

January 16, 2008, I met this man:


We met at a Red Cross Blood Drive in the USU LDS Institute.

It was the last day and I hadn't been able to go until the last minute as they were accepting their last few people. So I slipped in, signed and sat down with Twilight for a good read. I was going to be here for a few hours. A few minutes later this man sat down.

"What you reading? Looks interesting." he said with a grin.

I explained a bit of the plot and then we started talking about other things, got to know each other a bit. And got into a really animated conversation about Anime, particularly InuYasha.

During this conversation, I had to show off my brand new toy, my insulin pump. He was extremely interested, found it an excellent invention. I explained about being a
type 1 diabetic. He smiled and listened, learning rapidly. Asking questions when he wasn't sure on something.

It was then our turns to finally give blood. We sat close to each other so we could keep talking. We raced to see who could pump out blood faster. If I remember right, he barely beat me.

"Man, let's hope we never get in a knife fight."

"Why?"

"We'd be gone in under ten minutes considering how fast we just bled out."

I laughed and he grinned bigger.

We sat down eating our snacks they gave us as I checked my blood sugar and bolused for the food. He was curious to learn what the number I had just gotten meant. I taught him and then we got back to talking about InuYasha.

"Hey, I've gotta go grab some books from the bookstore." I said standing up after 20 minutes.

"Mind if I tag along? I'd love to keep talking."

With a giddy grin I said heck yes.

Another hour later I had gotten all my books I needed and we were walking to the bus stop.

"Hey, do you have a cell phone?"

"Um... no." He looked slightly sheepish. "I have an email though."

"That'll work."

We swapped and I turned to go get on the bus. About to get on the bus I spun around.

"Hey! Hang on a sec.... What's your name?"

We laughed as he called back, "Zane."

When I got home I sent him an email and we began the novels of chatting that we have written.




We changed our status on Facebook to "In a Relationship" within two weeks.

He became my Sweet Guy here on The Lucky Druggie. He inspired my only favorited Twitter: Heaven help me, I think I'm falling for him.

And our first picture was taken:




We became fast and very close friends, even to now, best friends.

We helped each other through school. We studied and spent nearly every waking moment together. He learned my highs, dreaded my lows, but stuck with me every moment. Knowing my signs better than me at times.


We dreaded summer vacation's arrival but it came anyway. I helped him move out, met his mom and probably kissed him a good 50 times (even gave his mom a hug). Wishing we did not have to separate.

But separate we did. He to the Salt Lake area with his parents and I to little podunk Delta where my grandparents took me for the summer. We'd work during the day, come home and chat as soon as we could. Generally into the early morning hours. I became the self-titled "Hermit" in the room my grandparents had given me.

I visited my family in Seattle for a week on a spur of the moment decision.

Sweet Guy's family picked me up from the airport and I stayed with his family for the Memorial Day long weekend. We'd only been apart for a few weeks but it felt so much longer.

I started loving his family that weekend.


Two months later, at the end of July, we made a trip to Malad for an old friend's Mission Farewell. Staying with my parents. He laughed at just how small Malad truly was. A boy who'd always lived in Salt Lake, thought my town too small to merit it's full name of Malad City. He loved my family, thought my brother's awesome even if purposely irritating.

We visited the Salt Lake Temple talking of getting married there in May 2009. We saw the Christus and fell even deeper in love with one another.



Weeks later, August 12, 2008, we were chatting on MSN, like we did every night. Sweet Guy asked a question that I still get giggly about remembering.

"Want to get married sooner?"

And my prompt "Hell yes!"

After calling up my family via a four-way call. We moved up our date to December 20, 2008. And promptly changed our Facebook status to "Engaged".

The final months of the last year were a whirlwind. Finding a job, an apartment, staying sane, planning our reception, walking home from work together, kissing in the dark and always talking endlessly.

Our mothers, our families, our friends did so much for us, helped us get everything accomplished in the time we had. I just want to thank them all for all they did. Without them, none of this would have happened nor would all of it gone so well.

On October 17, 2008, Zane's family came up and we all went up into Logan Canyon to take engagement pictures. As we posed for the first picture Sweet Guy said, "Hang on, there's something you need before we can take these pictures."

He dropped to one knee and reached into his shirt pocket, with a smile he took my hand.

"Jessica, will you be my companion for time and all eternity?"




He slipped the ring onto my finger and all I could do was just nod, smile and kiss him.



A week before the wedding, right after Finals finished, we booked it down to Salt Lake. He stayed at his parent's, I at his sister's. In that week we finalized all the rest of the reception that hadn't been finished yet and my mom baked... and baked and baked. She was who I asked to make our cake.

The entire week, it was snowing. And not just a little, enough that even seasoned Utah drivers were struggling to get from Point A to Point B. The snow stopped a good portion of family from arriving. December 19th was the worst night of them all. Snowing all day and all night. Leaving the roads a mess. We set up the reception that night and his father drove me back to Sweet Guy's sister's for the last time that week.

The morning of the wedding, Sweet Guy and his family left 2 hours to come pick me up from his sister's house. (A trip normally made in 30 minutes.)

They arrived just as my aunt's finished the touches on my hair and makeup. (I'm hopeless when it comes to either.)



We made it to the temple with plenty of time. And I'll simply say that the ceremony was even more beautiful than I ever would have imagined.

Before we came out, my aunt's and my grandma helped me get dressed up for pictures.

When Sweet Guy saw me walking up to him all dressed up in my wedding dress, with a veil and the whole shabang, I've never seen him stare so.




Our Facebook now says "Married".






Coming out.



My parents. Couldn't have done it without them.



Our Families.



Naw, we're not completely twitterpaited still.



My family.


My amazing mom.

The rest of my pictures are on: http://picasaweb.google.com/jnpedersen2