Tuesday, June 17, 2008
I Am Not Lazy, I Am Tired.
Grandma came in at around 11:30 telling my to get my lazy bum out of bed. The "lazy" caught my attention and stung. She is not the first person to call me lazy. A couple of mornings ago my aunt said something similar. Now, I know most people say that in fun. Just being funny but enough honestly believe I'm just plain lazy, that it's starting to bother me. Roommates, brothers, family and friends think me lazy because when I'm not running a million miles an hour people usually find me knocked out on a couch, floor or where ever I sat down to rest.
I am becoming irritated with this assumption. I sleep because I am dead tired. Because I cannot keep my eyes open and have lost all concentration. I sleep to refuel so I am able to keep up with others and to do as much as I can. I do work hard. You may not see everything I do but I am doing it and it wears me down fast.
It drives me nuts that I wear out so fast and need to sleep and rest as often as I do. I am always tired. I am never not. I can only conclude that it must be attributed to my diabetes. I did not feel like this before I got diabetes. My numbers are always in flux, bouncing daily from the low sixties to the high 200s on many days. I have not figured out how to smooth out the instability, I'm working on it. But it wears me out. The only way I can keep up is to sleep and restore a bit of energy.
I identify with The Spoon Theory. (I would highly recommend clicking on the link if you are not familiar with the story) I may not have Lupus but I am rarely not tired and must pick and choose what I can do. When I don't, I feel the consequences.
So next time you come across me, fallen asleep on the couch or sleeping longer than you think I need to, please leave me be. I need it.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Helping. I Love It.
"I appreciate the help, it's nice that you came." She thanked me.
"No prob, I had nothing else to do anyway."
"So I couldn't help but notice that you are diabetic." She pointed at my pump.
"Yeah, I love this thing. Makes life a lot easier." I grinned, I always love to brag about my pump.
"My niece just got one last week. We're hoping it helps her a lot. So what do you like about it?"
We jabber jawed a bit about diabetes and then switched to talking about who I am related to here in Delta. Like everyone else in Delta, she instantly knew my Grandparents and told me which of my aunts and uncles she went to school with.
When we had finished cleaning up I offered her my cell phone number just in case her sister ever needed some advice on using the pump or on Diabetes in general.
So this morning about 10 minutes after the 8 am phone call from my boss saying that we weren't working today, I got a call from the woman I had spoken with. I rolled back out of bed and answered the phone.
"Hey Jess? Could I ask you a favor? I'm babysitting my niece today and her infusion site pulled out and I can't figure out how to put in a new one."
"Sure, where you at?"
She gave me directions and I got over there as fast as I could. When I got there, Both Grandma's and a couple of aunts were gathered around the little girl, worried. I think the little girl is around 4 years old. Cute little girl. They showed me all the supplies and handed me the instruction book. They were telling about the night they'd had. Last night she had been so high the meter couldn't read her number and then she woke up this morning at 54. Sounds A LOT like my first few weeks on the pump. It took me a while to get used to it too. They showed me the site that had pulled out, asking if it were kinked, It was kinked right in the middle. So that explained why she had been so high the night before.
After about 20 minutes of fiddling with the site inserter I finally figured it out. The girl's pump is an Animas versus my Medtronic Paradigm. So it took me a bit to figure out I had to pull the tubing out before I could cock the inserter. But we finally got it done and got her arm cleaned off and that girl impressed me a lot. I know that it doesn't hurt to put a site in but she didn't even flinch when I told her that I was about to put it in. She was too engrossed in the juice she was sipping on. After about another 10 minutes I finally soldiered through the menu's and got her pump primed and running again. So after being badgered with thanks, I told them it was no problem and told them to call me if they ever needed help again or just wanted to talk.
I'm glad I went to that Primary activity on a lark, I'm glad I basically forced my cell number on her, (I'm a little awkward sometimes when exchanging information.) And I'm glad work was canceled so I could help out.
I feel good.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Evasion ID
Taking Care Of Eight.
I'm referring to number eight on my Randomly Weird list. I just went and took the written part of my driver's test. I passed, missing two questions, giving me a 96%. So now all I need to do is pass Driver's Ed and I'm set to go. Woot!
Thursday, June 5, 2008
10 Randomly Weird
Alright, I've finally got time to sit down and do this.
Once you've been tagged, you write a post with 10 weird, random facts, habits or goals about yourself. At the end, choose 6 new victims to be tagged, list their names, and why you tagged them. Don't forget to leave them a comment saying ('You're It!') and to go read your blog. You cannot tag the person that tagged you (Jeff, in my case,) so, let me know when you are done so that I can go read your blog answers. Here are my ten:
1. I am a chronic chatter. I have over 70 contacts between Google Chat and Windows Live (MSN) and then there's Facebook chat. I guess that would be about 130 contacts there. If I'm not at work or I'm not running errands, I'm glued to my computer, chatting. I usually have around 8 chats going at the same time. What's really a challenge is when someone then calls me on the phone or comes into my room to talk to me. THAT is difficult. So if you want to chat with me, I'm almost always online.
2. Hmm, I'm a cataholic too. Seriously, my first word I've been told was 'Meow'. I love cats to a fault. As soon as I have a home I can have cats in, I'll have one. My whole life I've had a cat as long as I can remember. My time at college was sad without a cat. I wish they'd let us keep cats in the dorms.
3. What else?...I like to collect baseball caps, it's not that weird, it's just something I do. Not only do I collect them but I wear them nearly non-stop. I always get surprised comments on days that I'm not wearing a cap.
4. A goal of mine is to collect enough books to make a library in my home someday. I'm a bookaholic too. (If you haven't picked up on it, I get addicted to things very easily.) Just a couple of nights ago I read through a whole night's worth of sleep just to finish a book.
5. I've always wanted to be an astronaut, I was set to go into the military but then I was diagnosed a week after meeting with the recruiter. But anyway, since third grade, I had always wanted to be an astronomer and an astrophysicist. So I was going to join the military, get my schooling in Computer Science and Electrical Engineering first so I could be a mission specialist and then I'd go back and get my second degree in Astrophysics.
6. Odd fact: I don't have a real home address at the moment. When I'm asked for my address I usually give my grandparent's address at the moment but I'm only here for the summer. I can't use my apartment at the moment because that's in Logan. And my parent's address is in Idaho and even further away.
7. I have the weirdest hang up (as AA called it) in the world. It drives me nearly batty when two surfaces with texture rub or scratch against each other. Like feet across carpet or two paper towels rubbing against each other. Literally sends a shiver right down my back so bad I kinda spaz. Just thinking about it can do it. I was reading something on the plane up to Seattle and there were some things doing just that and I shook so bad that my seat mates stared at me for a full minute. I just pretended it didn't happen. (Yes, I am incredibly weird)
8. I'm 19 years old and have never taken driver's ed. I'm taking it this summer.
9. Sweet Guy has accused me of having a technology fetish because when I'm asleep in my bed you can always find my Mp3 player, my laptop, my cell phone and of course my insulin pump. :D I've had more than one morning where I wake up wrapped up in four different wires. Pump, laptop power cord, cell phone charger and headphones.
10. I have classified having an Mp3 player as a need not a want now. Anywhere you find me, you'll find that I either have my laptop playing music or my ears stuffed with my Mp3 player. I need music more than a Druggie needs their next fix. lol I'm just a bit addicted. So if you want to get my attention and I'm not answering, check my ears for ear buds. I'm not ignoring you, I just can't hear you.
Well if you read this and you have a blog, you're tagged. It's the honor system to let me know if you've read it and you're going to do it.